Older gay top

Thomas Gass, a dentist in California, has survived the curse—twice. The curse? Gass is a gay man whose only sexual attraction is to men significantly older than he is.

Gass lost his first partner, 28 years his senior, through the leisurely deteriorating effects of Lou Gehrig’s disease after they had been together for 13 years. After recovering from his grief, he initiate love again with a man 18 years older but endured another tragic loss when his second partner died of pancreatic cancer after they had spent 17 years together. Still a relatively young bloke, Gass might wonder whether or not to take a chance on loving an older bloke again. For him, however, the choice is between an older man or no man at all. Gass and his friends—all of whom had lost older life partners—have labeled their abiding sexual attraction “the curse of being attracted to older men.”

I began to study same-sex relationships with age disparities while conducting verb for my manual, Finally Out: Letting Go of Living Straight. Gass and I started to correspond after he and his friends had read and discussed my essay

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